The beverage queen...

So, a quick peek into the interior of my Maxima shows a graveyard of empty beverage bottles. Proof, that I am the beverage queen.

In my defense, I require a lot of fluids daily. I step into my cubicle around six in the a.m. and so that necessitates a giant coffee from 7-11, then I need a bottle of Tropicana Orange Juice to keep me from fainting (it's a blood sugar thing) then a vitamin water (I love vitamins) to get me through the day.

That's not all.

On my way home from work, I stop again and get a plain old bottle of Smartwater to keep my brain sharp and hydrated. If I go out at night, I need a Sugar Free Red Bull to get me amped up and ready to shake my money-maker.

So, that's my average daily (workday) consumption of beverages. However, there is the occasional stop to the vending machine for a bottle of water, or tea and then of course, the random (and later regretted) purchase of chocolate milk (I hate dairy products).

Now for the (buried) nut graph.

Let's calculate how much my dirty little bottled beverage addiction is costing me per year ( I'm scared already).

Here goes:

20 oz. coffee: $1.29
Tropicana Orange Juice: $1.89
Vitamin Water: $2.49
Smartwater: $1.99
Sugar Free Red Bull: $3.49

Now, we can agree that there are about 260 work days if I take no vacations or sick days at my full time job, which would never happen, so we'll use the adjusted amount which is 230 days.

Each day my beverage consumption total is $11.15 without taxes.

That means that I'm spending $2,564.50 (gasp) annually to keep my car's dirty bottle collection freshly stocked.

The good news is that I'm frequently properly hydrated.

The bad news is that I'm still pretty poor and that's a lot of money to be flushing down the toilet (what goes in must come out right?)

Anyway. I've come to the conclusion that regardless of the fact that I love being the beverage queen, it might not be worth the catchy title.

I've realized that I have to relinquish the bottle arsenal that I arm myself with daily.

That will make me sad.

But to make myself happy, I've come up with a plan. As a consolation prize to myself, I've decided to put my hypothetical daily beverage money into a piggy bank, and at the end of the year, treat myself (and my boyfriend) to a cruise where we can sit at the open bar and DRINK ALL THE BEVERAGES WE WANT!