I’m only writing you this because I know that sometimes, the best observations we can have about ourselves are those that others give us.
I know that you are unhappy right now and I know that it's something that nobody can take away from you, it's something that you'll have to figure out on your own. That won't be easy, but maybe this will help.
One thing I’ve learned is that you have to have inner happiness before you can be with someone else and be happy. But you’re still learning and trying to figure out what it is that makes you happy in life. When you strip away the distractions and look inside yourself, what is it that makes you intrinsically happy?
Is it money, friends, going to the gym or what? Too often, people forget to think about this. It’s such a hard question to answer, because sometimes we can't see the difference between the things that make us happy and the things that just occupy our time.
One thing that will never give you happiness is the pursuit of money. It’s normal to want to have financial stability, but after you gain it, then what? In a few months you’re going to have a great paying job — then what’s your next goal? Some people call it the quarter-life-crisis, a full fledged panic attack that you get once you realize that you've accomplished everything you''ve wanted to, and holy shit... now what?!
I know that you feel sometimes like you’re trying to beat the clock.
Squeezing the most out of the little time you have left to be a kid.
That’s normal.
Growing up is scary and losing all the friends you’ve made at school and being hurled into the grown-up lifestyle is jolting. Nobody really wants to give up Tuesday night drunken bowling, nobody really wants to iron suits for work at eight and 401Ks are overrated. But you can't outrun time, and everyone has to take that next step.
I hope that when you are ready for that next step, you remember to keep the things in life that make you happy.
Those things aren't work, or your job, or your friends, or anything superficial like that.
Having these things in your life will keep you happy inside all the time, it will make your job tolerable, it will sustain you and carry you through life, even the hard parts.
You’re a wonderful person, and I hope you find intrinsic happiness to take you along your pursuit of success.
You don’t have to respond to this, and you don’t even have to read it, and you can think I’m an idiot or whatever. It’s just that you're so miserable lately that we don't talk much anymore, and I realize that you feel like you're up against the world all by yourself.
But you're not, and I just wanted you to know, that sometimes the best observations we have about ourselves are given to us by others, and that even if we don't want to hear them... sometimes we should.
--Leanne.
