It's early Saturday morning and I wake up to my phone ringing.
The ringing sets off a painful thumping that bounces around inside my skull and my mouth tastes like cherry vodka.
I glance at the number. It's mom. I try to forward to voicemail but I accidentally pick up the call. Guess my coordination hasn't recovered from my night on the town.
"Hunny, I know it's early but the Facebook says you're in a relationship and that it's complicated," she says.
"Mom, what time is it?" I ask her. I try to sit up in bed and I feel spinny so I sit back down.
"Are you having relationship problems?"
"No," I reach for a stale glass of water on my nightstand and take a giant swig.
"Then what happened?" she demands.
"We broke up like a month ago."
"Oh my gosh! You should have told me!" she says. "What's the matter are you sick? You sound awful."
"Mom, I'm not sick I'm just hung over-"
"Why are you drinking? Are you depressed about the breakup?"
"No I am not depressed about the breakup. We're not even broken up. Well maybe."
"Was he cheating?" she asks, "He looked like a cheater."
"He wasn't cheating mom," I tell her. "I just don't want to talk about it."
"Well then why does the Facebook say 'It's complicated?"
The ringing sets off a painful thumping that bounces around inside my skull and my mouth tastes like cherry vodka.
I glance at the number. It's mom. I try to forward to voicemail but I accidentally pick up the call. Guess my coordination hasn't recovered from my night on the town.
"Hunny, I know it's early but the Facebook says you're in a relationship and that it's complicated," she says.
"Mom, what time is it?" I ask her. I try to sit up in bed and I feel spinny so I sit back down.
"Are you having relationship problems?"
"No," I reach for a stale glass of water on my nightstand and take a giant swig.
"Then what happened?" she demands.
"We broke up like a month ago."
"Oh my gosh! You should have told me!" she says. "What's the matter are you sick? You sound awful."
"Mom, I'm not sick I'm just hung over-"
"Why are you drinking? Are you depressed about the breakup?"
"No I am not depressed about the breakup. We're not even broken up. Well maybe."
"Was he cheating?" she asks, "He looked like a cheater."
"He wasn't cheating mom," I tell her. "I just don't want to talk about it."
"Well then why does the Facebook say 'It's complicated?"
I sighed and massaged my temples, willing my headache away and cursing my love for tequila.
"Why are you on Facebook," I mumble. "It's 9 a.m."